Saturday, December 14, 2013

Blended Families

                After a divorce what is the average distance between he once married couple? It may come as a surprise, but the average distance is around 400 miles apart! Why are they so far apart?
                The reason can change depending on the parent. Mothers usually move because they remarry, there new spouse has a job that requires them to move, or they themselves get a job, and sometimes they move to be closer to family for support. Meanwhile a father is more likely to move because of a job. He now has to pay for two families and it cost a lot of money. He can also remarry witch will at the expenses of his family. Another reason that father moves is because he feels like his kids don’t need him anymore.
                When a divorced person remarries its important tot relies that there are now two separate families. Sometime people still see it as one family. This can be harmful to the newly formed family. It has been said that it takes at a minimum of two years for a stepfamily to receive a sense of normality. It must be understood that when a new family is starting out that it is going to be hard. You are in the process of trying to blend two completely different families into one. Traditions are different, habits are in the process of changing, and what are we to do!!!!!! Remember it takes two years, two cycles of going through all the holidays together.

                Three ways to help make the two year transition easier are first; let the birth parent do all the heavy discipline. This will help prevent the stepchildren from hating you, and causing more problems. Second, the stepparent should be like a favorite uncle or aunt. Children tend to talk to their aunt and uncle about certain things more then they tell the parents about it. As sad as it is as a step parent you will never be able to take the place of your step child’s birth mother or father. Third, counsel with your spouse regularly. This allows both of you to know what is going on in the family. It also allows you to make plans of action when something isn’t working what do we need to change to make it better.

1 comment:

  1. Great insights, when we have difficulties in marriage how can we encourage the best coping skills in our own families. What are some of key principles from the course you want to keep with you? Elder M. Russell Ballard has said, "Indeed, nothing is more critically connected to happiness—both our own and that of our children—than how well we love and support one another within the family." How can you encourage happiness in your current and future family? Have a Merry Christmas and I hope you reflect on the importance of family this holiday season!

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